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Whupass for Wimps

Alternatives to "Opening a Can o' Whupass" for the Less Confrontationally Inclined

Unsnapping a Purse o' Politeness

Decanting a Carafe o' Contrition

Unzipping a Fanny Pack o' Friendliness

Sipping a Demitasse o' Diplomacy

Refrigerating the Tupperware o' Temperance

Unscrewing a Thermos o' Thoughtfulness

Gently Folding a Napkin o' Negotiation

Checking the Date on a Carton o' Caution

Serving an Apéritif o' Avoidance

Unpacking a Portmanteau o' Panic

Emptying a Wastebasket o' Withdrawal

Sealing and Applying Postage to an Envelope o' Escape

Lightly Greasing a Ramekin o' Retreat

Applying a Beechwood Veneer to a Hutch o' Hiding

Cleaning Out a Drawer o' Disappearance

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Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
luxlis
Dec. 28th, 2004 02:20 pm (UTC)
I loved this list. The lists on McSweeney's have to be my favorite feature after Open Letters.
silverdee
Dec. 28th, 2004 03:23 pm (UTC)
I recently discovered McSweeney's and love it. This just tickled me - especially "Serving an Apéritif o' Avoidance."
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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